Suddenly Royal, or Suddenly Stupid

Well, here we go again.? In the latest episode, “King” David, or Drew, talked many times about wanting to move to the Isle of Man permanently and getting a job driving taxi and/or being on the radio.? It is pure bunk.? I moved there with my family in 1994.? At the time, I had the personal recommendation of the British Consul and still had to write what was, in effect, an essay explaining why it would be good for the Isle to let me in.? I had heard that it was even more difficult to be admitted now, so I checked it out.

Isle of Man 1994 Yearbook, which KD obviously never read.

Isle of Man 1994 Yearbook, which KD obviously never read.

The only chance KD has is General Migrant, since his claim of kinship is not a grandparent, which is the most distant relative allowed for claiming kinship.? According to the official Isle of Man government site (not KD’s “official” site), requirements for “indefinite leave to remain” on the Isle under General Migrant are (click here):

The applicant must have spent a continuous period of 5 years lawfully in the Isle of Man, of which the most recent period must have been spent with leave as a Tier 1 (General) Migrant, in any combination of the following categories:
(i) as a Tier 1 (General) Migrant,
(ii) as a Highly skilled Migrant,
(iii) as a Work Permit Holder,
(iv) [Not used],
(v) [Not used],
(vi) as a Writer, Composer or Artist,
(vii) as a Tier 2 (General) Migrant, a Tier 2 (Minister of Religion) Migrant or a Tier 2 (Sportsperson) Migrant, or
(viii) as a Tier 2 (Intra-Company Transfer) Migrant

Work permit holders don’t include taxi drivers or “radio personalities,” obviously, so what are his chances of getting a temporary “right to remain” under that category and hanging in for 5 years to make it permanent?? Since the changes to the law in 2010, they are nil.? Here’s what it says: ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?? Tier 1 (General) Migrants? ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? This route is now closed except for indefinite leave to remain applications.
That means that unless he was already there as a General Migrant in 2010 when the law was changed, that road onto the Isle is closed to him.? Thank God.

Perhaps KD might be able to hold a job for 30-48 days, but that’s it.? So it’s all a joke, just like KD.? No immigration, no job.? It looks like he didn’t check it out, TLC didn’t check it out or they both ignored the laws.? Most likely, there was no intention of KD and family moving to the IOM, just making a little “Reality TV” drama.A real knighting by a king.

Then came KD”s plan for an “investiture” of “knights,” an incredible farce.? Lord K thought it was a good idea.? Since he bought his title and KD has previously tried to sell “knighthoods” as “King of Mann” for 40,000 pounds, perhaps he thought he would get a kick-back for titles sold.? But KD had a hard time giving them away.? Stu Peters, a personality on Manx Radio accepted, possibly taking the mick out (pulling the leg) of KD, because it would make an interesting radio program.? Mol Holmes, the kind fellow who loaned KD a bathtub for the Castletown Tin Bath Race, refused.? Typically a Manxman who says much with few words, he merely stated, “That’s pushing it a bit.”? But “Push” is KD’s middle name.? Or one of them.? I have a few more I could add.

After a ludicrous rehearsal at the ruins of Peel Castle (not named in the show), he decides to ask his “royal etiquette expert,” Lady Cruella, I mean Lady C, if he should go through with it.? For once, I agreed with her.? “That is the official act of an acknowledged monarchy,” she told him.? “You are not an acknowledged monarch.? You are a claimant.? No phony investitures.”? The whale started to blubber.? “I don’t want to be an embarrassment,” he said.? WHAT!? That’s all he is.? Without embarrassment, he wouldn’t exist.? Lady C notes that European men don’t break into tears so easily.? It should be noted that neither to American men with cajones.

You're live on Manx Radio!

You’re live on Manx Radio!

I did love when Stu Peters interviewed him on Manx Radio.? Promised knighthood or not, the velvet glove was off the mailed fist.? As KD sat, doing some spastic boogie with his hands before the interview, he bragged about not preparing.? It was soon obvious.? Stu stated that the House of Keys had categorically rejected KD’s claim, then asked KD three things he would do as king, if they suddenly did an about-face.? KD was like a deer in the headlights, sitting there with a typically stupid look on his face and saying nothing.? Finally, Stu threw him a bone, asking if he would reduce income taxes.? KD took the bait and said he would reduce them.? Guess what?? the Isle of Man is a tax haven, having taxes far lower than the UK or Ireland, and the USA.? With a maximum rate or 20% and no capital gains or inheritance taxes, many rich seek to live there for that reason.? But KD was too stupid to even check out such basics about his “kingdom.”? His closing statements were well-considered to win friends and influence people, especially the Manx.? “I am the king.? That’s a fact,” he pronounced on air.? “You’d better get used to it.? I’m the king and I’m here to stay.”? Afterwards, when talking with his wife, he said he thought the interview went okay.? Another case of a grand delusion.

KD continued to display lack of class, and poor taste to the end of the episode.? When it came to taking his wife out for a special night on the town, what did KD and his wife wear?? Jeans.? While America is more casual in attire than the Isle of Man, we are not all slobs.? When we lived on the Isle and went to a quality restaurant, I wore a coat and tie.? And not with jeans.? Maybe he was taking Pam to that Scottish restaurant in Douglas: McDonald’s.? Probably splurged and bought her a Big Mac.? And three for himself, to maintain his impressive physique.? Or should that be Himself?

In closing, let me quote from other sources on the Net and comment.

According to Fox News:? Howe filed a claim with Her Majesty’s Stationary Office on Dec. 20, 2006, they published the claim in Queen Elizabeth II’s paper of record, the London Gazette, and after no one objected, they sent him a crown, robe and anointing spoon for the ceremony, he said.?”It kind of blew up into something big,” Howe said. “I’m certainly not challenging the Queen’s authority or sovereignty over the island. I haven’t amassed an army or anything like that to invade, so I’m certainly not a threat at all.”

I'm your king.  Resistance is futile.

I’m your king. Resistance is futile.

Although I’ve already discussed why no one responded, who the heck sent him “a crown, a robe and an anointing spoon?”? I will go out on a limb here and definitely state it wasn’t the Queen.? As to KD not “amassing an army,” I’d love to see him and any idiots he might garner to invade the Isle go up against the United Kingdom Special Forces. ? Really.? I’d love to see it.? Actually, the Manx wouldn’t need any help from the UK to kick his “royal” butt.

According to TLC, KD got an invitation to the Duke and Duchess’s royal wedding.? Why hasn’t he shown it anywhere, including on his official website (Click here)?? Smoke and mirrors, smoke and mirrors.

Next time I’m going to address KD’s ties to?The Sovereign Magistral Order of the Temple of Solomon.? One good joke deserves another.? Or, to paraphrase the quote attributed to Admiral Farragut, “History and facts be damned, full speed ahead.”